Oh ok... I'm thinking too simplistically again. But that's me... why make it so complicated when it can be that simple? 拿得起就要放得下。Wait.. you sure it's so easy for you to "放得下？"
Ok let me prove my point by telling you a story... long long time ago in China, in central China to be exact.....
Ok much easier to use an analogy than to tell a story. Today someone told me about this analogy that makes me see a whole new perspective in life. Let me try to regurgitate the same analogy as much to you and see if you can see my point:
Try holding on to a cup of water. You might think that it's a piece of cake. Try holding it for 5mins, you'll start to feel the discomfort. Hold on for another 5mins, you'll start to feel the strain. Hold on for another 5mins, you'll start to feel the pain. Hold on for another 5mins, you'll start to feel the agony and think that you want to die.
So what about after holding it for 5mins, put the cup of water down, rest for a while, flex your hand muscles and then hold it back up for the next 5mins. Isn't it easier to do it this way; taking a min's rest before you continue to do what you're supposed to do?
The cup of water can be your responsibility in life or at work or it can be cups of water in broader sense when you juggle a few "cups" with both your hands or on your arms and knees, all at the same time. Some of us carry or choose to carry upon ourselves, many cups of water. We just need to learn when to put them down for a while before putting them back on us again. Thus we're not talking about throwing the cup or cups of water away; it's about understanding the balance and the need to know when to "放下“,"let go" for a while so that we have the physical or mental strength to achieve what we want to achieve in the longer term; towards achieving our ultimate goal.
In my humble opinion, in a similar context, when you miss someone who's no longer around, you'll need to let the feelings go once in a while or for an extended period of time, simply because you'd need to take a step back and reassess your priorities in life. Makes no sense to mire yourself in self-pity or sadness and forget about your priorities in real life. It makes no sense either, to push away your caring family members or friends who are still around you, giving you the support that spurs you on.
Having said that, our innermost, innate feelings are still intact; the very feeling that you still have for the very special person who lives in your heart forever. So true to the essence of the "holding the cup of water" analogy, it's easier to miss someone this way than to either think about the person every single moment of your life or to forget the person totally and move on.
Back to our main topic of the day about hatred or hating someone. And so... even if you hate someone, you'll need to take a break once in a while to take a well-deserved breather. Get that irritating person out of your mind for a while, so that you can hate him "longer" without feeling the strain!
Then again, isn't it easier to let go of this cup of water which you can choose to let go? Unlike responsibilities in life or someone you love whom you'd want to hold on to, you can easily throw away this cup of water which is causing you so much pain and agony.
That's about all; my humble 2 cents worth. Oh ok.. I knew it; you gonna say, it's not that simple after all lah! I would just retort again..."Why make it so complicated when it's so simple lah!"
Rene Descartes' "I think therefore I am (cogito ergo sum)". Sounds familiar? It's all in your own state of mind; you're what you are thinking. Choose to feel angry or choose to feel happy? F!@#$% it's your damn choice lah!
